Season 1 Episode 82
People pleasing is different from cooperation.
Cooperation = connection, no loss of autonomy, requires frustration tolerance
People Pleasing = abandoning self because it is too scary or uncomfortable to regulate through the rupture in the relationship.
People pleasing is a stress-response. It’s a behavior that the “Trickster” possum uses when the possum pathway is activated.
If you aren’t sure what I mean by possum pathway, check out this podcast/blog: https://robyngobbel.com/possumbrain
I also describe the owl, watchdog, and possum brain in my free eBook, What Behavior Really Is, which you can download HERE.
Some folks call this people-pleasing behavior “fawn.”
I call this “trickster” behavior.
Over on my website you can find:
Masterclass on What Behavior Really Is (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
In depth parent course: Parenting after Trauma: Minding the Heart and Brain
CLICK HERE to read about The Club and join the waitlist for the next time we welcome new members
Published on 3 years, 6 months ago
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