Episode Details

[uncensored] 

*Trigger Warning* 

Adult Language 

-Lost Cause. 

TITLE: THE PAGE

WRITTEN BY: CC STONE

FORMAT: PILOT TREATMENT / SCREENPLAY OUTLINE WITH DEVELOPMENTAL NOTES

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                               CAST OF CHARACTERS

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LILY TURNER

A woman residing in her mid-to-late thirties, outwardly disheveled, possessing 

neither a baccalaureate degree nor formal background within the media and 

entertainment infrastructure. She is a functioning alcoholic subsisting purely on 

unemployment subsidies and entire delivery pizzas consumed in single sittings. 

Intellectually stranded, she constructs esoteric fan fiction, naps amid cascading 

floodwaters, and harbors an illicit, persistent infatuation with Seth Meyers.

JOJO

A youthful prodigy directly christened in homage to JoJo Siwa by a maternal 

figure steeped in the early 2000s cultural ether of "Dance Moms." Having accelerated 

through secondary school and undergraduate curricula at an anomalous velocity, 

she navigates life estranged from her midwestern, neo-conservative Mormon 

lineage, standing as a staunch LGBTQ ally while sparring with her mother over 

historical domestic hypocrisies.

CECILE "CICI" BAKER

A hyper-calculated Machiavellian operator within hospitality whose interest in 

artistic expression is an absolute void, entirely subordinated to the acquisition 

of executive hegemony. Armed with preliminary degrees in business, finance, and 

accountancy, she procured a doctorate in literature solely to satisfy the 

aesthetic mandates of the corporate recruiters.

MERRILL

A New York slumlord of singular incompetence, physical clumsiness, and profound 

credulity. An Indian immigrant bearing a thick accent, he maintains neither the 

wealth nor the administrative precision typically stereotyped, operating a 

precarious corner bodega subject to chronic municipal sanctions. Twice divorced, 

thrice wed, his third bride remains an enigma absent from living memory.

SASCHA

The Head Page and archetype of administrative dogmatism. Impeccably groomed, 

concise, hyper-effeminate, yet stubbornly, vociferously insisting upon his 

absolute heterosexuality despite seven openly homosexual siblings and entirely 

liberated parents. He adopts the cosmic role of an inquisitor dedicated to 

unearthing Lily's illegitimacy.

EMMIT

A predatory network senior executive insulated by inherited wealth, corporate 

impunity, and a private domestic butler. Cognizant of Lily's fabricated credentials, 

he attempts to leverage her vulnerability into coerced romance, perpetually 

skating on the razor's edge of absolute public denunciation by the ascendant 

cohort of junior pages.

DEXTER (A.K.A. "DJ D.E. HYPNOTIK")

An administrative wunderkind harboring delusions of sonic genius. As a disc jockey, 

his artistic palate is an absolute calamity; any coherence in his performances 

is an accidental byproduct of automated Spotify crossfade functions. He squanders 

his livelihood upon esoteric synthesizers he cannot operate, while his commercial 

tracks are synthesized by artificial intelligence.

POLLY DUVOE

A third-generation oligarchic heiress possessing arctic-blue eyes and totalitarian 

temperament. She performs the piccolo, boasts of donning developmental 

undergarments, actively disdains glacial ecology, and maneuvers social spheres 

elevated enough to secure admittance to Taylor