Episode Details

What if the more we try to think our way out of a problem, the more stuck we become? 

In this episode of The Choice Space, Dr Lee David speaks with clinical psychologist and author Dr Jessamy Hibberd about why we overthink – and what can help us step out of the cycle.

Overthinking can take many forms – replaying conversations, dwelling on past events, worrying about what might happen or repeatedly questioning whether we have made the right decision. Although it can feel as though thinking harder will bring clarity or certainty, it can instead leave us feeling worse and take our attention away from the people and experiences that matter to us.

Overthinking can be particularly difficult to let go of when we feel anxious, low, ashamed or uncertain. Using the image of a spotlight, Jessamy describes how our attention can narrow around one problem until it begins to feel like the whole picture – making it harder to see other perspectives or possibilities.

The episode looks at practical ways to interrupt this pattern, from noticing when overthinking has taken hold to changing what we are doing before trying to change what we think. Movement, connecting with other people and taking small actions can broaden our perspective, build self-trust and help us learn from what actually happens rather than what our minds predict.

The conversation also considers the role of uncertainty, discomfort and the expectations we place on ourselves. Accepting that we cannot always feel good, know for certain or get everything right may leave more room for living our lives rather than continually analysing them.

Key moments

 00:00 When attention gets stuck
 03:35 When thinking becomes overthinking
 07:20 Different ways we overthink
 10:26 The search for certainty
 13:18 Why we get stuck in our thoughts
 17:06 Choice Pause – creating space
 21:04 Why overthinking is hard to change
 22:37 Steps for breaking the cycle
 26:04 Why taking action can help
 30:22 Changing what we do first
 32:09 Building confidence through small steps
 36:11 Letting go of impossible expectations 

About the guest

Dr Jessamy Hibberd is a Chartered Clinical Psychologist, bestselling author and speaker with more than 20 years' experience supporting adults with mental health difficulties. She has written ten books, including The Overthinking Cure: How to free your mind and focus on what really matters and The Imposter Cure: Beat insecurities and gain self-belief.

Jessamy also works as a media psychologist, appearing on national radio, podcasts and in publications including The Guardian and Good Housekeeping. Her motto is: ‘What we do every day makes the biggest difference. It’s small steps that lead to the greatest changes.’ She shared this message, and her personal and professional experience of how to find happiness, in her TEDx talk ‘Adventure of a Lifetime.’ 

You can contact Jessamy via her website, follow her newsletter, find her books and connect via social media @drjessamy

About the host

Dr Lee David is a GP, CBT therapist and author specialising in mental health and wellbeing. Lee has written many books on CBT, mindfulness and teen wellbeing, and speaks regularly at conferences and in the media. Away from work she enjoys running, hiking, singing in a choir and spending time outdoors with her family. You can find Lee through her website and on Instagram,