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When Your Teenager Stops Listening | How to Rebuild Trust and Influence
Published 1 day, 18 hours ago
Description
Few situations test our communication skills like a teenager who stops listening and starts pulling away.
Joseph Grenny responds to a concerned parent whose daughter has been breaking rules and shutting down attempts at conversation. The parent wants to guide her toward better choices while still being someone she feels safe talking to.
Joseph explains why influence starts with letting go of control and shares four ways parents can reopen dialogue: separating fear from principle, owning their part, getting curious about their teenager's behavior, and holding boundaries without turning them into weapons.While the advice is directed at parents, the principles apply to anyone navigating a difficult conversation. Joseph reminds us that lasting influence comes from creating safety, building trust, and choosing curiosity over control.
Chapters
[Start] When Your Teenager Stops Listening: Joseph Grenny responds to a concerned parent whose daughter is making risky choices and shutting down conversations.
01:39 Influence vs. Control: Why parents can't control their teenagers' choices and how letting go of control creates room for influence.
02:07 Separate Fear from Principle: How parental anxiety can lead to lecturing, interrogation, and reactions that make communication harder.
03:02 Own Your Part: Why acknowledging your own behavior can help rebuild trust and create safety for an honest conversation.
04:49 Get Curious About the Behavior: How to look beyond a teenager's decisions and ask questions that uncover what they really need.
05:41 Hold Boundaries Without Weapons: Why being a safe person doesn't mean being permissive and how to set consequences without anger or fear.
Links and Resources
The Crucial Skills Podcast is brought to you by the authors and experts at Crucial Learning, home of Crucial Conversations for Mastering Dialogue and Crucial Conversations for Accountability training.
Joseph Grenny responds to a concerned parent whose daughter has been breaking rules and shutting down attempts at conversation. The parent wants to guide her toward better choices while still being someone she feels safe talking to.
Joseph explains why influence starts with letting go of control and shares four ways parents can reopen dialogue: separating fear from principle, owning their part, getting curious about their teenager's behavior, and holding boundaries without turning them into weapons.While the advice is directed at parents, the principles apply to anyone navigating a difficult conversation. Joseph reminds us that lasting influence comes from creating safety, building trust, and choosing curiosity over control.
Chapters
[Start] When Your Teenager Stops Listening: Joseph Grenny responds to a concerned parent whose daughter is making risky choices and shutting down conversations.
01:39 Influence vs. Control: Why parents can't control their teenagers' choices and how letting go of control creates room for influence.
02:07 Separate Fear from Principle: How parental anxiety can lead to lecturing, interrogation, and reactions that make communication harder.
03:02 Own Your Part: Why acknowledging your own behavior can help rebuild trust and create safety for an honest conversation.
04:49 Get Curious About the Behavior: How to look beyond a teenager's decisions and ask questions that uncover what they really need.
05:41 Hold Boundaries Without Weapons: Why being a safe person doesn't mean being permissive and how to set consequences without anger or fear.
Links and Resources
- Crucial Learning
- Dealing with Defiant Teenagers: How to Connect for Parental Influence
- Crucial Conversations for Mastering Dialogue
The Crucial Skills Podcast is brought to you by the authors and experts at Crucial Learning, home of Crucial Conversations for Mastering Dialogue and Crucial Conversations for Accountability training.