Episode Details

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Your co-parent did something that pissed you off. Does your attorney need to hear about it?

The kids come home in clothes that stopped fitting three years ago. Your ex introduces a new partner without following the parenting agreement. Someone buys concert tickets on your parenting night—and tells your child before asking you. Meanwhile, you’re finding out about school issues after everybody else.

When you’re navigating a high-conflict divorce or custody dispute, it can be hard to tell the difference between an irritating interaction and a concern that deserves professional attention. Ignoring everything doesn’t feel right. Paying your attorney to address every problem gets expensive. So how do you decide?

In this episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Andrea Rappaport welcomes back Atlanta family law attorney, former judge, and guardian ad litem Dan Bloom to work through real co-parenting scenarios. Dan keeps returning to one question: How is this affecting your child?

Andrea and Dan explore why context matters, how to recognize patterns, and how to raise concerns with your attorney or guardian ad litem without turning every email into a custody battle. They also discuss why asking children to keep secrets between households changes the conversation—and how to respond when your child shares something uncomfortable.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• How to assess co-parenting conflict by its effect on your child.
• When clothing disputes become more than an argument about missing outfits.
• What to consider when an ex introduces a new partner outside the parenting agreement.
• How to support a child who has been told to keep a secret from you.
• How to handle activities scheduled during your parenting time.
• Why repeated exclusion from teacher emails and school information deserves attention.
• How to document concerns without spending every day reliving them.
• Why Dan generally recommends checking with your attorney before raising an issue with a GAL.
• How to ask for help in a way that focuses on your child and a workable solution.

What matters to your child may be different from what bothers you.

A missing shirt may not affect your child’s day. A missing comfort item that helps them sleep might. An inaccurate comment to a friend may be frustrating; misleading a teacher about the other parent’s involvement can have different consequences. Dan explains why the details matter more than assigning every incident the same level of urgency.

The conversation also tackles the emotional trap of trying to get your ex to admit you’re right. You may never receive that apology or satisfying final email. The more useful goal is protecting your child from the conflict, recognizing concerns that need attention, and choosing a response that serves your family.

Connect with Dan Bloom

Dan consults on high-conflict custody matters in Georgia and throughout the country. If you need help thinking through difficult co-parenting situations or preparing to communicate with a GAL, reach out to ask whether his consulting services are a fit.

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