Episode Details

What does it really mean to be a man who is struggling?

For this episode of Beyond Four Walls, Jodie Fraser is joined by Jeff Tucker from Best Mates, John Lewis from JL Mindset Performance and Ed Hopgood from Sub Rosa Counselling for an open and honest conversation about men’s mental health – and the weight that so many men carry without ever talking about it.

We hear a lot about encouraging men to speak up. But perhaps we also need to ask a more difficult question: why do so many men feel that they can’t?

From the pressure to provide, perform and remain strong, to loneliness, relationships, work, identity, self-worth and the expectation to simply keep going, this conversation explores what can be happening beneath the surface when someone tells us, “I’m fine.”

Jeff shares his perspective on the importance of friendship, community and connection, and why having people around you doesn’t necessarily mean you aren’t lonely.

John explores mindset, resilience and performance, including the danger of tying our self-worth to what we achieve and the point at which “pushing through” can stop being resilience and start becoming harmful.

Ed brings the counselling perspective, helping us understand why vulnerability can feel so difficult, why some men wait until they reach crisis point before seeking support, and what it really means to create a space where someone feels safe enough to talk.

Together, we discuss:

• The pressure on men to be strong and cope
• Why “I’m fine” can hide so much
• Loneliness, friendship and the importance of genuine connection
• Work, success, identity and self-worth
• The difference between resilience and simply pushing through
• Why vulnerability can still feel uncomfortable for many men
• The stigma that continues to surround counselling and therapy
• Recognising when somebody may be struggling
• How friends, families and workplaces can offer meaningful support
• Why asking for help should never be seen as weakness
• What we can all do to make conversations about men’s mental health easier

This isn’t about telling men to simply “talk more”.

It’s about understanding why some men don’t feel able to – and creating environments where they can.

Because sometimes the people who appear to be carrying everything are the ones we need to check on the most.

The Weight Men Carry is a conversation about pressure, vulnerability, connection and changing what strength looks like.

🎙️ Beyond Four Walls
Hosted by Jodie Fraser

Guests:
Jeff Tucker – Best Mates
John Lewis – JL Mindset Performance
Ed Hopgood – Sub Rosa Counselling

Episode release: 17 September 2026

A note to listeners: This episode discusses mental health and emotional distress, which some listeners may find difficult. The conversation is intended to raise awareness and encourage discussion and should not be considered a substitute for professional mental health advice or support. If you are struggling or feel unable to keep yourself safe, please seek appropriate professional or emergency support.

Thank you so much for listening to Beyond Four Walls. If you’ve been inspired by today’s conversation and you’d like to share your own story, I’d love to hear from you. You can reach me directly at jodie@jodiefraser.com if you’d like to be a guest on the podcast.

I’d also like to say a special thank you to my podcast producer, Shirley Ludford, at Swindon 105.5 – Swindon’s award-winning community radio station. It’s run by an incredible team of volunteers who are passionate about giving a voice to the local community. You can find out more about the station at www.swindon1055.co.uk

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