Episode Details
Back to Episodes
Why You Feel So Lost in Your 40s (It’s Not Just Anxiety) | The Forties Formula
Description
In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim sit down with therapist Sapna Makwana Hanspal to explore the kinds of grief that often go unnamed, the grief that comes with life changing.
For women in their 40s, grief can come from far more than losing a loved one. It can come from a changing identity, a changing body, fertility ending, a dream that didn't happen, a relationship changing, or realising you've outgrown a version of yourself.
The conversation explores how grief can show up as anxiety, burnout, anger and exhaustion, how grief can be carried across generations, and why grief doesn't need to be “gotten over”, it needs to be integrated into our lives.
Finally, Sapna shares her 40s Formula: make space for all of it, the joy, the grief, the losses, the possibilities and the disappointments.
Chapters
00:00 — The grief we don't realise we're carrying
02:02 — Are women in their 40s grieving?
03:20 — Disenfranchised grief
04:05 — Grieving a changing identity
06:25 — Grieving the end of fertility
07:02 — Gender disappointment and the loss of a dream
10:12 — Grief connected to our parents
11:07 — The sandwich generation and ageing parents
14:27 — Divorce and hidden grief
17:29 — Anxiety, burnout, rage and exhaustion
20:30 — How to support someone who is grieving
23:56 — The five stages of grief
25:57 — Integrating grief into your life
28:04 — Growing up as a third culture kid
30:15 — From finance to psychotherapy
32:32 — Can grief be passed between generations?
34:31 — Grieving the life our parents didn't get to live
37:02 — The grief of a life never lived
38:42 — Reconnecting with a lost part of yourself
40:50 — Practical ways to work through grief
42:17 — When your body knows before your mind
45:02 — Can movement and self-care help?
47:51 — Everyone has their own timeline
50:23 — Focusing on what you can control
51:40 — Hot or Hype: Deserving closure
52:06 — Hot or Hype: Everything happens for a reason
52:39 — Hot or Hype: Time heals all wounds
53:12 — Hot or Hype: Cutting off family
54:17 — Hot or Hype: Staying strong for the family
55:36 — Sapna's 40s Formula
About your hosts
Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition.
https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/
Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health.
https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/
Support the podcast
If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share this episode with someone navigating a major life transition or learning to let go of a version of themselves.
You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee:
https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee
Thank you to our sponsors
For Youth
Support your skin, recovery, sleep and longevity with The Forties Formula System. Use code TF35 for up to 35% off storewide.
https://www.foryouth.co/go/the-forties-formula-system
Love Indus
Use code TFF for 21% off.