Episode Details

Have you ever met someone who was kind, emotionally available, and consistent... only to find yourself pulling away, overthinking, or waiting for something to go wrong?

What if the biggest obstacle to the healthy relationship you want isn't finding the right person—but recognizing the protective patterns you've carried into love?

In this episode of The Secret Formula of Femininity, licensed psychologist Dr. Nicole Monteiro explores the psychology behind self-sabotage in relationships and why many high-achieving women unknowingly push healthy love away.

You'll discover:

💚 What self-sabotage really is (and why it isn't a character flaw)

💚 Five protective patterns that quietly damage healthy relationships

💚 How childhood experiences and past heartbreak shape your nervous system

💚 Why healthy love can feel unfamiliar—or even uncomfortable

💚 The difference between intuition and fear

💚 Practical ways to interrupt unhealthy relationship patterns

If you've ever wondered why you overthink, pull away, test people, or expect disappointment even when someone is treating you well, this episode will help you understand yourself with more compassion and clarity.

✨ Want to continue the work?

The Damsel Me Please Guided Journal was created to help women reflect on relationship patterns, strengthen healthy boundaries, reconnect with their femininity, and intentionally build healthier relationships. You'll find it linked below.

💬 I'd love to hear from you:

Which protective pattern resonated with you the most?

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