Episode Details

“You’re not living up to your potential.” If those words have haunted you, you’re not alone — and the story you’ve been telling yourself about why might be wrong.

Dr. J breaks down two patterns she sees in her ADHD clients: the person who checked out after years of “you’re smart, you just don’t apply yourself”; and the high achiever whose color-coded planners are hiding total exhaustion. 

She digs into research on ADHD and perfectionism, and why so many women spend decades masking or overachieving without ever getting a diagnosis.

Then, five concrete strategies: 

• Understanding your type of ADHD
• Creating distance from the inner monologue
• Figuring out whose goals you’re chasing
• Building a plan that works with your brain instead of against it
• Unmasking with the right people

Your potential was never a ceiling you kept failing to reach. It’s a launching pad — and you get to define it.

For more on this topic 

• Watch: ADHD and burnout
• Watch: ADHD and people pleasing

For a transcript and more resources, visit The ADHD Channel for Women on Understood.org. You can also email us at podcast@understood.org.

As kids head back to school, it's a good time to remember: not every student experiences the classroom the same way. Through My Eyes, a free interactive experience from Understood, lets you step into a day in the life of a kid with ADHD, dyslexia, or dyscalculia. See their strengths and challenges in a whole new way. Try it out here.

Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

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