Episode Details

Inner compassion is the foundation for how you treat yourself and everyone else. It’s how your energy enters a room and is felt before you say a word. In this podcast episode, Meg Reilly talks about extending the same kindness to yourself that you’d offer a good friend.

Building Inner Compassion

The podcast interview started even though I forgot hit record. When we finished, my heart sank as I realized that mistake meant there was no recording. We had to start over.

My first reaction was to feel embarrassed and unprofessional. What a dumb thing to do. With sadness in my voice, I told Meg what happened. We laughed a bit uncomfortably. Then I asked if she had time to do the interview again. She did – phew and on we went.

How interesting that our conversation was about compassion and that the best place to start is with yourself. Meg asked something that made me stop and think. If a good friend made that same mistake, would I give them a hard time about it or be kind and supportive? Most people do not treat themselves as well as they treat dear friends.

Treat Yourself Like You’d Treat Your Best Friend

Meg’s coaching and writing focus on helping people live with more inner compassion. She has a simple way to check for it. When you make a mistake, stop and ask yourself what you’d say to a friend who did that same thing. You wouldn’t call her names or rehash the mistake for the next several hour, right? No, you’d say, “It’s okay. What should we do now?”

That’s the kindness you owe yourself too. Meg admits this doesn’t always happen automatically. It takes practice. Building inner compassion is a lot like building muscle at the gym because it requires regular practice.

Compassion Can Be Just Showing Up

Not every kind of compassion involves fixing something. Meg spent time working in hospice care, simply sitting with patients who were unconscious or close to death. There was no problem to solve and nothing to say. She offered her calm presence and sometimes held a hand.

This kind of compassion doesn’t look like much when viewed from the outside, but it is felt. People who’ve had near-death experiences describe being aware of who was in the room with them. Being there IS the act of compassion.

Your Energy Enters the Room Before You Do

Meg described what happens when she walks into a room full of strangers. She can immediately sense who’s happy and who’s miserable even if no words are exchanged or no physical contact is made because the energy is there.

This is where the idea of self-compassion can often be underestimated. When you’re kind to yourself, that energy ripples out into how you treat everyone around you. And it continues rippling from there, like that proverbial pebble dropped in a