Episode Details
Back to EpisodesThe Advice Trap: Why the Hardest Person to Coach Is Yourself
Description
When should a leader provide the answer—and when does that answer prevent someone else from learning how to think?
In this episode of The Leadership Buzz, Buzz Buzzell explores The Advice Trap by Michael Bungay Stanier through the lens of nearly 40 years of military leadership, nuclear operations, and command-center decision-making.
Some situations require decisive direction. Safety, compliance, and mission-critical standards are not optional. But not every problem needs the leader to step in and take over.
Buzz examines how the “advice reflex” becomes wired into experienced leaders, why it can be difficult to recognize in ourselves, and how quickly helping can turn into taking ownership of someone else’s problem. He also shares what military leadership and executive coaching have taught him about the difference between providing necessary direction and creating space for someone else to think.
You’ll leave with three practical coaching tools:
- Notice the urge to immediately solve the problem.
- Use WAIT—“Why Am I Talking?”—to slow yourself down.
- Ask one more question before offering advice.
The episode also explores why silence can be a powerful leadership skill and how listening helps people feel seen, heard, and understood.
Finally, Buzz offers three coaching questions to help leaders practice curiosity, develop better judgment in others, and create ownership instead of dependence.
Subscribe to The Leadership Buzz, share this episode with a leader who always feels responsible for fixing things, and leave a rating or review so more leaders can discover the show.
Work hard. Tell the truth.
The Leadership Buzz is hosted by Lloyd “Buzz” Buzzell, an ICF-ACC executive coach, DISC practitioner, and retired U.S. Air Force officer with 37 years of leadership experience. Each episode focuses on one book, one idea, and one practical leadership concept to help you align your behavior with your values and lead with greater clarity, trust, and impact.
If you’re a leader who wants to build stronger teams, improve communication, and create real ownership, subscribe and share this episode with someone on your team.
Connect with Buzz on LinkedIn or visit workhardtellthetruth.com for coaching and leadership development resources.
Work hard. Tell the truth.