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This week on Is it ADHD or Life? – A Couple’s Perspective, we’re doing an Agony Aunt special… and honestly, it’s one of those episodes where you might laugh, cringe, and feel personally attacked all in one go.

We start with Donna having a new toy (will it get confiscated?) and a catch-up on the chaos of the last couple of weeks. Donna has started and finished her new job, Adam’s been flat out with nursery graduation parties, and we talk about the stress of juggling everything. Adam also has to give Donna some proper credit this week for being the backbone of the family lately (write it down, it happened).

Then it’s the big event of the week: Donna’s birthday. Was she spoiled? We talk birthdays and ADHD symptoms in full force:
- Face reading and Adam trying to work out if Donna likes her presents
- Time blindness and leaving everything to the last minute
- The judgement, pressure, and panic Adam puts on himself
- RSD and the “is she disappointed?” spiral
- The stress of banners, balloons and cake on birthday mornings
- Has medication calmed any of it down?

Adam nearly breaks into song… until he realises he bought tickets for the wrong singer. Classic.

Then we get into the main reason for this episode: an ADHD Agony Aunt special from both perspectives. We go through listener questions and stories and answer honestly from both sides. This could get heated.

We cover:
- Forgetting wedding anniversaries and important dates (and whether Dear Deirdre was actually an adult agony aunt)
- Forgetting dates from both perspectives, and Adam not appreciating Donna’s tone
- Calendars, reminders, and why we need to use them properly
- Impulsive spending and Amazon orders: when does it become “too much” or an addiction?
- Sneaky spending, online baskets, and Monzo accounts (Adam even gives actual advice… but does he follow it?)
- Unfinished projects: is it ADHD or just life? Does it lead to guilt spirals?
- Gamifying tasks, motivation, and whether life is just too busy
- Text messages: is it worse to be left on read or unread? Is it rude not to text back?
- Replying immediately vs replying “eventually” (and if you don’t reply within 3 days… is that friendship over?)
- Forgetting things on the school run and whether heat makes ADHD worse
- Systems you can put in place so you’re not living in constant panic

We also talk about why we started this podcast in the first place: not just to help the person with ADHD, but to support the partner too.

5 minute moans this week:
- Donna’s involves pass the parcel (it’s a manly one this week)
- Adam’s wedding ring pressure: does it have to be on 24/7? Should he just get Donna tattooed on his forehead?

Then it’s What Adam’s learned on Facebook this week about ADHD:
- Brackets (are you an over-user?)
- Favourite self scanners in shops (comment if you’ve got a favourite at your local)

We finish with your good, bad and funny listener stories involving presents, birthdays, and forgetting things — keep them coming.

This week we cover:
- ADHD and birthdays: time blindness, RSD, pressure, and last-minute chaos
- Relationship dynamics: face reading, tone, misunderstandings, and stress
- ADHD Agony Aunt Q&A: anniversaries, calendars, spending, unfinished projects, texting, school run chaos
- Impulsive spending, Amazon orders, Monzo budgeting, and sneaky spending
- Executive dysfunction, guilt spirals, and gamifying tasks
- Forgetfulness, routines, and systems that actually help
- What Adam learned on Facebook: brackets and self scanners

Watch on YouTube:  
https://youtu.be/5r0Bi2YiYwc

Monzo referral link:  
https://join.monzo.com/c/4w6zqv8

Listen on Spotify:  
https://open.spotif