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https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0HPZDR3H3?utm_source=chatgpt.comhttps://books.apple.com/us/book/id6825440276https://books.apple.com/us/book/id6825440276Episode Title: Don't Walk Away: Finding the Person Beyond Alzheimer'sHost: Bill ClarkeGuest: Marilyn Raichle, author of Don't Walk Away: A Care Partner's Journey

Bill Clarke:Welcome to another episode of Scrambled Eggs & Ham.
Tonight, I'm going to be the scrambled eggs, and Marilyn, you're going to be the ham. I hope you like ham!
Our special guest this evening is Marilyn Raichle, author of the remarkable book Don't Walk Away: A Care Partner's Journey.
Marilyn was kind enough to send me a copy of her book, and after reading it, I can honestly say it is one of the most moving books I've read in a long time. It's deep, it's honest, it's heavy in all the right ways, and it truly touched my heart.
Let me read something from the back cover because it captures the heart of her story.
"She grew up in the shadow of Alzheimer's. Nearly everyone in Dad's family and many in Mom's developed the disease. Mom warned us, 'Keep your distance. Your father and I will be in a safe place. There's nothing more you can do. So walk away. We won't remember you. Live your life and don't sacrifice it for us.'
I believed her.
As I began my caregiver journey with Mom, I saw only loss, not the person. Heard only confusion, not the thoughts. Everything changed in an instant.
Then Mom began to paint."
Marilyn, thank you so much for joining me on the Scrambled Eggs & Ham podcast.

Marilyn Raichle:My pleasure. Thank you for inviting me.

Bill:I really appreciate you sharing your time with us and with our listeners.
There's so much in this book that resonated with me. One part that especially touched me was your mother's painting because I'm also a painter. After my stroke, painting became part of my own recovery. I know firsthand how art can reconnect us with ourselves.
So I'd like to begin with the question that stayed with me after finishing your book.
Your mother repeatedly told you to walk away.
What happened inside you that made you decide to walk toward your parents instead?

Marilyn:Well... with huge reluctance.
There were five children in our family, and Mom told all of us over and over again to walk away if this ever happened.
We believed her.
That was the family plan.
Then I went away to graduate school. When I came back, it was during the recession, and there simply weren't any jobs.
My family got together and said,
"Okay... we're going to pool our resources, we'll keep your phone on, and you're going to become the family caregiver."
Well... suddenly I had a job.
Not the job I wanted.
Not one that paid very well.
But it was a job.
I couldn't walk away.
The truth is...
I wasn't a very good caregiver.
Every day I'd hear Mom's words in the back of my mind telling me,
"Walk away."
I'd spend my visits looking at the clock.
I didn't know anything about caregiving because I never intended to become one.
For that first year, though, Mom and Dad were still my parents, and we all wanted the best for each other.
Mom wanted the best for Dad.
Dad wanted the best for Mom.
Then everything changed when Dad died.

Bill:Let me ask you something.
Did your father also have Alzheimer's?

Marilyn:He had Parkinson's disease, and Parkinson's can also cause dementia.
He likely would have developed Alzheimer's-type dementia had he lived longer because it was in his family as well.
Both of my parents needed care.
I always want to make somethin