Episode Details

Most leadership problems are just communication problems in disguise. So what if you could master communication by treating it not as a soft skill, but as a sport you can practice and win? In PART ONE, communication expert Erik Berglund unpacks his playbook, revealing the three distinct arenas of communication: information transfer, shared experience, and pure influence. He challenges you to recognize that your default communication style is likely a foreign language to others and provides the master key to unlocking how anyone—from a client to your spouse—truly wants to be persuaded.

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

Communication is a Sport, Not a Gift: Stop believing that great communicators are born, not made. Erik argues that communication is a professional skill that improves dramatically with deliberate practice and targeted feedback, just like athletics. He honed his own skills through early role-playing in high school, proving that anyone can level up their ability to connect and influence by treating communication as a trainable discipline.

The Three Arenas of Communication: To communicate with intent, you must first know which game you’re playing. Erik divides all communication into three categories: transferring information (teaching or explaining), sharing an experience (connecting and bonding, often nonverbally), and influence (causing someone to do something they wouldn't have done otherwise). Understanding which arena you're in dictates your strategy and clarifies your objective.

Adapt or Be Ignored: Your default communication style—whether it's driven by logic, abundance, or risk avoidance—is not universal. Trying to persuade someone using a "language" they don't speak is a guaranteed path to failure. The first step to becoming influential is acknowledging that your preferred method of making a point is likely not the way the person across from you needs to hear it.

🤫 PART ONE's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART ONE!)

The single most effective way to understand someone's communication style isn't through complex analysis or trying to read body language—it's to simply ask. If you need to persuade someone, ask them directly: "If someone had to make a compelling argument to you, what would you hope to see in that argument?" They will tell you exactly what they need to hear, whether it's data, stories, or a vision for the future.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"If you practice something and get feedback on it, you get better at it. And that doesn't just happen in sports." – Erik Berglund

"My primary way of thinking about communication is being influential. That means getting somebody to do something they would not have done otherwise." – Erik Berglund

"Recognize that your default style is probably not the way everybody around you would prefer to be communicated with... It's like they speak a different language." – Erik Berglund

👤 About Erik

Erik is the founder of the Language of Leadership and Loominary, and the host of the 'I have some questions' podcast. His work focuses on changing what people say and how they say it in order to be influential. His companies create skill simulation systems that allow people to practice the most difficult conversations before they occur in real life. He lives in Bend, Oregon with his daughters (10 and 7) and his wife of 13 years. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Connect with Erik on LinkedIn
• Check out the I Have Some Questions Podcast
• Visit the Loominary website

🎧 Make sure to listen to PART TWO and keep waiting for that momentum to hear Erik Berglund’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" in PART THREE