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Your child won’t get in the car, won’t answer your calls, or suddenly treats you like the enemy, and you keep asking the same question: how did we get here? We sit down with Kathy Himlin, a licensed marriage and family therapist with decades of experience in high-conflict divorce and custody cases, to unpack what “rejected parent” dynamics really look like when the story is not as simple as abuse versus no abuse.

We dig into Kathy’s child-centered, safety-first approach to reunification and parent-child repair, including the four stages she uses to screen risk, give kids a real voice, and help parents rebuild trust through validation and attachment repair. She explains why rushing a parent and child into the same room can crash and burn, how “validation scripts” work, and why kids should not be asked to carry adult emotions or do the relational heavy lifting. We also talk about patterns that quietly make rejection worse, like coercion, threats, tactical gifting, or losing control at transitions after being triggered by a co-parent or the court process.

Then we zoom out to the reality many parents feel but rarely say out loud: the family law system can be dysregulating and traumatic. We share practical ways to protect your child’s routines, reduce exposure to court stress, spot signs your child is falling apart, and build predictability across two homes.

If you want more support, Kathy shares resources including her book The Rejected Parent and her coaching and consulting at Himlinconsulting.com. Subscribe, share this with a parent who needs it, and leave a review so more families can find these tools.

To connect with Cathy Himlin or to get a copy of her book visit her website:

https://www.himlinconsulting.com/

Hi and welcome to Thrive and Decide. I’m your host Sarah Thress. This podcast is intended to help women who are going through a divorce, continplating divorce or have lost a spouse feel seen, heard, understood and not alone. All the beautiful souls who share on here are coming from a place of vulnerability and a common belief that sharing your story will help others. You will also hear from industry experts on what to do and not do while going through a divorce.

Sarah Thress
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