Episode Details

There’s a question that sits quietly in the minds of thousands of people every single day — and this week, one woman had the courage to send it to Olivia’s Instagram DMs: “How do I push past the fear and file against my narcissistic ex? We have a two-year-old.” In this intimate solo episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell speaks directly to that listener — and to every person navigating the terrifying intersection of narcissistic abuse, co-parenting fears, and the decision to finally leave. This is the episode for anyone who has sat with a racing heart and asked: am I safe to do this?

Olivia unpacks one of the most misunderstood dynamics in high-conflict divorce: that the fear you feel before you file isn’t a sign that you’re weak — it’s evidence that your nervous system has been conditioned by someone who weaponized fear to keep you in place. She addresses the most common concern that holds parents back — the children — and offers a clarifying, research-backed reframe: staying in a toxic dynamic doesn’t protect your kids. It shapes them. A two-year-old’s nervous system is learning what love and conflict look like right now, from the environment you’re living in. Filing for divorce isn’t abandoning your child. In many cases, it’s the most protective thing you can do.

This episode closes with a powerful reminder: you do not have to white-knuckle your way through a narcissistic divorce alone. Building your team — a family law attorney experienced in high-conflict cases, a therapist or divorce coach who understands narcissistic abuse dynamics, and a circle of people who know the truth — is not a luxury. It’s a survival strategy. If you’re in this season right now, this episode will give you something more valuable than advice: it will give you permission to take the first step.

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