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What Happens When You Stop Abandoning Yourself: For Parents of LGBTQ Teens
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Join me on Substack for more tools to stay human in a complicated world.
What if the exhaustion you feel has less to do with who you are and more to do with how long you’ve been pretending?
In this Friday Reset: The Butterfly Effect, Heather reflects on her powerful conversation with Stef Vachon and explores what happens when survival mode slowly disconnects us from our authentic selves.
So many people learn early that being fully themselves feels unsafe.
We shape-shift.
We perform.
We shrink.
We prioritize belonging over authenticity.
And eventually, we lose touch with who we really are.
In this deeply reflective episode, Heather explores:
- The difference between surviving and truly living
- How shame disconnects us from ourselves
- Why authenticity can feel unsafe
- The grief of abandoning parts of ourselves to fit in
- Reconnecting with joy, creativity, identity, and truth
- Why healing is often less about becoming and more about remembering
This episode is for anyone who:
- Feels disconnected from themselves
- Is tired of performing for acceptance
- Wants to feel more grounded, authentic, and alive
- Is healing from shame, people-pleasing, or hiding
- Needs permission to take up space exactly as they are
You are not broken.
You adapted.
And maybe now you get to come home to yourself.
Press play to listen now and If this episode resonates with you, share it with someone who may need the reminder that they do not have to earn the right to be themselves.
Hi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!
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This is a place to feel messy while you're figuring it out.
At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and grow their capacity for courageous connection.
For parents, allies, and those pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heartwarming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.
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