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Episode 46: Autistic Grief, Co-Regulation, and the People Who Keep Us Human
Description
Matt and Erin are back for another mailbag episode — and this one gets deeply personal. From losing an “anchor person” to navigating autistic grief, relationships, PDA parenting, and co-regulation, this episode explores what happens when the people who help hold our world together are suddenly gone or overwhelmed. It’s vulnerable, funny, heartbreaking, and very, very autistic.
We cover:
Why autistic grief can feel like losing your “internal compass” — not just a loved one
How partners, friends, and safe people often function as essential disability supports
The fear, disorientation, and loneliness that can come after losing an “anchor person”
Matt and Erin’s personal experiences with divorce, loss, burnout, and rebuilding stability
PDA parenting, “dueling gremlins,” and how co-regulation creates room for flexibility
Why autistic love is often rooted in safety, routine, and nervous system relief
Transformers, Doctor Who, fountains, art galaxies, chicken nuggets, and the sacred role of biscuits and gravy
Also: the loneliest whale in the ocean, emotional support toast, “people…” as a replacement swear word, and Matt casually admitting he’d probably make a good spicy audiobook narrator.