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413. You're not for everyone? GOOD!
Description
It’s easy to believe that being liked by as many people as possible is a positive attribute. But when we chase this, we risk compromising our sense of identity, alienating ourselves from others, and being confused and burnt out by a string of inauthentic connections. In this episode, we examine what drives us to people please, acknowledge our need for human connection, and learn to recognise how to shift unhealthy patterns towards healthier, self-soothing ones.
We explore:
• What drives our need to belong
• The science behind why others don’t think about us as much as we imagine
• Why being a social chameleon can make others distrust you
• Why constant social monitoring is a waste of mental energy
• How we can reframe our thinking to recognise if we truly like someone, rather than just enjoy being liked
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Our favourite sources:
https://unwantedlife.me/the-spotlight-effect-and-social-anxiety-all-eyes-on-me
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8405711/
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