Episode Details

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In this episode of The Art of Imperfect Adulting, Amy Stone speaks with Peggy Sharr about the multi-layered journey of getting a burning mouth syndrome diagnosis, living with chronic pain, and the profound intersection of grief and physical health. Penny joins the podcast from Athens, Georgia. Listeners will gain insights into living with invisible illness, the maze of medical specialists, and the practical strategies Peggy discovered to reclaim agency and hope.

Peggy Sharr is a licensed clinical psychotherapist and the author of The Burning Mouth Syndrome Survival Guide and her new memoir soon to come out, Surviving the Family Kingdom, about growing up in a home-grown religious cult, which she escaped from at twenty-one and rebuilt her life from the bottom up. With more than twenty years of trauma-focused experience, Peggy blends clinical insight with the raw honesty of someone who has lived through a painful, poorly understood condition herself. Her work helps people navigate fear, medical dismissal, chronic symptoms, and the emotional toll of invisible illness. Peggy lives in Athens, Georgia, where she continues her private practice, writes, paints, and advocates for those searching for clarity, validation, and hope.

Main Topics Covered:

1. The elusive path to diagnosing burning mouth syndrome (BMS) and why so many patients feel misunderstood or dismissed.
2. Navigating overwhelming grief and how emotional trauma can influence physical symptoms.
3. The unique challenges of finding the right medical specialists—such as oral pathologists—and the realities of the “disease of exclusion.”
4. Why being your own detective, advocating for yourself, and tracking symptoms is crucial for rare and invisible illnesses.
5. Practical pain management: low arginine, high lysine diets, medication, and trial-and-error treatments for BMS.
6. The psychological isolation of invisible conditions—and how support groups and education help break the stigma.
7. How Peggy’s clinical experience as a psychotherapist shaped her approach to self-advocacy and later helped her support clients in new, more authentic ways.
8. Transforming adversity into activism: starting a nonprofit, writing a groundbreaking book for BMS sufferers, and the power of sharing your story.

Quote from the Episode:

"Sitting at a dinner, for example, or going out with friends, I’m sitting there, my mouth is on fire, and everybody’s just talking and enjoying themselves, and I’m just faking it... trying to go along and have a good time and not bring other people down. I’m not going to sit there and go, ‘By the way, everybody, my mouth is on fire.’" — Peggy Sharr

Timestamps:

00:06 Welcome, intros, and where Peggy calls home (Athens, Georgia)

00:58 Comparing Iowa and Georgia; reflections on Southern hospitality

02:13 Experiencing burning mouth syndrome after loss and grief

03:34 Using Dr. Google, self-diagnosis, and examining possible causes

04:41 The persistent, life-altering nature of symptoms

06:08 How foods and drinks affect BMS; coping and dietary adjustmen