Episode Details

Natassia Miller is a Brazilian-American sexologist (AASECT-certified), the founder of Wonderlust, a sexual wellness brand, and the writer behind the Lust in Translation newsletter on Substack. She studied political science at Columbia, worked in finance, and pivoted to sexual wellness after co-founding and exiting a prior wellness startup during COVID. In 2022, she launched Wonderlust with the Mindful Intimacy Card Deck after surveying 500+ couples and finding that communication was their #1 barrier to a better sex life. Her work has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Glamour, GQ, and NBC.

What makes Natassia such a natural fit for Well Said: her entire career is built on teaching people how to say the thing they've been avoiding. And the skills she coaches couples on, asking for what you want, creating safety, being intentional, repairing when something breaks, are the same skills every great communicator and leader needs.

In this episode:

- Why communication, not chemistry, not compatibility, is the #1 barrier to a better intimate life, and how that maps directly onto leadership and teams

- How to apply SMART goals to your relationship and sex life (and why it doesn't kill the mood, it builds the foundation)

- Kelly's lesson from managing 100+ people across 17 countries: if you only have 30 minutes with someone who matters, show up with intention

- The Wheel of Consent framework and how couples (and teams) can use it to negotiate what they actually need

- Pia's 24-hour rule: take a breath, don't react, come back with your best self

- Why bedroom confidence and boardroom confidence are built with the same muscles

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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS

00:00 — Meet Natassia Miller

00:02 — What a sexologist and two PR execs have in common

00:07 — SMART goals for your sex life

00:11 — Boundaries at work and at home

00:18 — The salty lemonade study

00:20 — Why new experiences keep relationships (and teams) alive

00:23 — Vulnerability as a communication superpower

00:28 — Planning sex doesn't kill the mood, it creates it

00:29 — Spontaneous vs. responsive desire

00:31 — The Wheel of Consent

00:33 — How to make someone comfortable talking about the hardest things

00:36 — Knowing what you want (and learning how to ask for it)

00:41 — Talking about sex makes talking about everything else easier

00:44 — Where to find Natassia and Wonderlust