Episode Details

Nobody hands you a rulebook when your marriage ends and you suddenly have to figure out how to parent from two separate addresses. The paperwork gets signed, the boxes get packed, the kids start splitting their weeks between two homes — and then it's Tuesday night and someone's crying over forgotten homework, and you realize the hardest part was never the divorce itself. It was everything that comes after. In this episode of Divorce Happens, host Olivia Howell sits down with Nora Marcus, a licensed social worker, co-parenting specialist, and divorce mediator who works with families across all 50 states — a professional, as she puts it, "who is holding your hand all the way." Nora brings a rare combination of clinical grounding and radical honesty to the conversation, refusing to sugarcoat what the post-divorce parenting journey actually looks like — because, as she reminds us, it's always dinner time. Someone is always hungry, there's always a school project, and your nervous system doesn't get a day off just because the papers are filed.

At the heart of this conversation is a reframe that every co-parenting parent needs to hear: your children are 50% their other parent. Which means every time you speak badly about your ex — even to your most well-meaning friends — your kids internalize that as something broken inside themselves. Nora doesn't just tell us to stop the trash talk; she invites us to go further, to actively build up our co-parent in front of our children, not as a favor to an ex we may still be angry with, but as an act of love for our kids' developing identity and self-worth. She also speaks candidly about the strange emotional terrain of showing up at a soccer game with someone you used to share a bed with, validating that the awkwardness isn't a problem to be solved — it's just part of the messy, human reality of divorce. And she offers a crucial reminder: pay attention to who you're calling when you need to vent. The people who love you most are sometimes the ones most likely to activate you, and activation is the last thing a co-parenting parent needs in a vulnerable moment.

What listeners will walk away with from this episode isn't a tidy five-step plan — it's something more honest and more useful than that. It's the permission to move slowly, to take small steps, to celebrate the fact that you made it through your first holiday without your kids or that you kept showing up even on the days you had nothing left. Nora's framework for post-divorce recovery centers on awareness, acceptance, and building the right team around you — whether that's a co-parenting mediator, a therapist, or simply a friend who knows when to cheer you on instead of pour fuel on the fire. She works with clients during divorce, through mediation and parenting plan development, and long after — because divorce isn't a singular event when children are involved; it's a lifelong relationship that evolves through graduations, college drop-offs, and co-grandparenting. For anyone navigating co-parenting after divorce, managing single parent mental health, or simply trying to figure out how to live a full life while raising children across two households — this episode is the steady, grounded voice you didn't know you needed.

Learn more about Nora Marcus: https://www.freshstartsregistry.com/resourceguide/nora-marcus-consulting

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