Episode Details
Back to EpisodesI Don't Love My Kids Equally....And That's The Point
Description
Loving your kids “equally” sounds like the gold standard, but I think it’s the wrong target. I’m sharing an unpopular opinion from my own house: when you have multiple kids, you don’t love them in identical ways, because they aren’t identical people. The real job is fairness making sure each child feels seen, valued, and secure, without sending the message that someone else matters more.
I start with family news and a fresh newborn that brought up a classic parenting question: what happens to your heart when you add another child? From there I break down what individualized parenting looks like with three kids close in age, including one strong willed, highly articulate boy and a set of twins who need room to become themselves. I talk about why comparison can quietly wreck confidence, how I encourage siblings to stop measuring themselves against each other, and why “you’re only in competition with yourself” is a rule I repeat constantly.
We also zoom out to the generational shift around mental health. Many of us were raised by parents shaped by survival first priorities, and now we’re trying to raise emotionally healthy kids in a loud, demanding world. I’m honest about burnout, the days I want to “get lazy,” and why I still believe this work matters more than grades, sports, or perfect résumés. What I care about is raising strong individuals with a moral compass, real independence, and a deep belief in their own value.
If you’re navigating sibling dynamics, twin parenting, mental health, or just trying to be a better parent on tired legs, this one is for you. Subscribe to Steel Versus Podcast, share it with a parent friend, and leave a review if it helps what part of this hits closest to home?
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