Episode Details

The holidays can be an especially painful time when you’re living with depression or anxiety—made even harder by grief, loss, and the lingering effects of the pandemic. In this episode, psychologist Dr. Maggie Mulqueen offers compassionate, practical advice for navigating the holidays when joy feels forced or out of reach.

She discusses how to release “Hallmark expectations,” embrace a both/and mindset (grief and gratitude can coexist), and discover a sense of purpose that can ease holiday depression. Whether you’re missing loved ones, overwhelmed by social pressures, or simply exhausted by uncertainty, this conversation will help you feel seen and supported.

Link to referenced article: www.drmaggiemulqueen.com/publications

Primary Topics Covered:

• Why the holidays intensify depression and anxiety
• The impact of seasonal affective disorder and the pandemic on mental health
• Three groups of people struggling differently with the holidays
• How grief and “empty seats at the table” affect holiday gatherings
• The importance of embracing a both/and mindset (sadness + gratitude)
• How to support loved ones by listening instead of minimizing feelings
• Why purpose and small acts of kindness help protect mental health
• The danger of “toxic positivity” during the holidays
• How to hold space for your own emotions without shame
• A hopeful closing poem: In the Time of Pandemic by Kitty O’Meara

Timestamps

00:00 - Introduction and context for the holiday episode
 01:00 - Why holidays during the pandemic are uniquely difficult
 01:20 - Dr. Maggie Mulqueen on the psychological impact of disrupted traditions
 02:14 - Why November through March is the busiest season for therapists
 02:53 - Cancelled gatherings and the emotional fallout
 03:11 - People experiencing holiday struggles for the first time
 04:15 - Those with pre-existing holiday blues losing their usual coping outlets
 04:57 - Families stuck together: why “home for the holidays” feels different
 05:56 - Grief, empty seats, and the difficulty of unacknowledged loss
 06:31 - Why there is no “right” way to celebrate the holidays
 07:26 - Learning to embrace both/and thinking for resilience
08:24 - Special considerations for people already living with depression
09:30 - Why purpose and small acts of kindness help protect mental health
10:47 - We’re not “post” pandemic: why collective trauma lingers
11:27 - Uncertainty and anxiety about the future
12:13 - Why urging joy or “just be grateful” can deepen shame
13:52 - The harm of not being heard and the weight of shame
14:39 - Final takeaway: embracing complexity and both/and thinking
15:35 - A Thanksgiving wish for gratitude without denial
15:55 - Reading of In the Time of Pandemic by Kitty O’Meara
17:23 - Reflections on hope, gratitude, and “the great reset”
18:05 - Closing wishes for listeners and a preview of next week’s episode

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