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You can't sit there
Description
We all know the feeling: walking into a room and scanning for safety. Holding back from posting because “who am I to say this?” Comparing our year one to someone else’s year five. Assuming a quiet patch means something personal.
But what if no one has actually excluded you?
In this episode, Julia explores the quieter psychology of self-exclusion: the decisions we make before anyone else has spoken.
She looks at:
- Anticipatory rejection and the illusion of control
- Pre-emptive withdrawal
- Comparison as self-protection
- The risk of saying, “This isn’t enough for me.”
- And how easily we mistake quiet for rejection
Before deciding you aren’t wanted, it’s worth checking whether anyone actually said that.
Here are the highlights of this episode:
(2.15) Anticipatory rejection
(2.46) Pre-emptive withdrawal
(3.18) Comparison as self protection
(4.20) Self exclusion as a form of control
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ABOUT THE PODCAST
The Dynamics of Everyday Life explores the psychological patterns shaping how we think, work and relate to others; bringing psychodynamic thinking into coaching, leadership and everyday life.
If you're a coach interested in learning more about psychodynamic approaches to coaching, you can explore Julia's training programmes on her website.
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