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Aunt Flo-rida Makes The Tampons Rain

Aunt Flo-rida Makes The Tampons Rain

Published 5 months, 1 week ago
Description

Today's Show:

1) Meade Skelton: From “frenemy” to cursed

  • Email from Meade: will no longer write songs for DV due to “spiritual issue.”

  • Tim responds with gay-witch curses:

    • Baldness hex (“From widow’s peak to naked crown…”)

    • Erectile dysfunction (“soft as a wet limp noodle”)

  • Theory: Meade blames DV for tummy/health woes; Tim vows double-down mockery.

  • BaitBanditXL (SoundCloud): “Beat That Dick Up,” “A Masturbator’s Morning,” plus “gas station bait” recordings.

  • Gooning lexicon, “All hail penis” chants; album teased: Chronicles of a Baiter.

  • Hat tip: TylerSaurusRex (Discord).

  • Album series: Radio On (school records yearly since 2014).

  • Tracks sampled:

    • Every Day We Grow” (aspiration litany)

    • Drip” featuring Snoop Dogg (light verse; “Rowenga/Warringah Park” shout)

    • From older albums: “I’m Positive,” “Sausage and Onions,” and the “Hello Song.”

  • Tim’s take: surprisingly catchy; “Hello Song” could out-Meade DV theme quality.

  • Thanks to Herbie (Discord) for the tip.

  • Customer claims she was skipped; proceeds to trash displays, hurl merch, and kick racks in slippers.

  • Tim: damage ≤ $25; “airfare has become too affordable” energy.

  • Still posting lives, sovereign-citizen vibes, FBI rants, pixel-mushed video.

  • Full report soon; for now, quick clips and status check.

  1. Florida Man… but Make It Menstruation

    • Volusia County: firefighter Gabrielle Franze accused of stalking/harassment—dumped ~75 red/“possibly used” tampons on ex’s lawn after he started dating.

    • Claimed they painted tampons red with mom & aunt’s help; charged with misdemeanors.

    • Tim: “Match the DNA,” Aunt Flo jokes, “period-pussy” throwback.

  2. American Airlines: Duct-Tape Season

    • Ketty J. DeLone (47) allegedly threatened crew, screamed “kill yourself, bitch,” confessed childhood roach-poison attempt on dad; restrained with flex cuffs + duct tape mid-flight CLT → LAS.

    • Prior DR selfie with evil-eye emoji; now facing federal charges.

  • Dank Tim: Cable ads do repeat back-to-back (even double MyPillow). Tim retracts old take.

  • Parking discourse: “Expecting mother,” “clean-energy,” “veterans” spots → generally not enforceable like handicapped (but private property = towing risk).

  • Challenger memory: TVs wheeled in, explosion, school pretended nothing happened; Tim counters with his “we iced a driver” bus story for trauma-top-trumps.

  • Blanche (Austin): Hates his boss; violent fantasies; Tim jokes about expired rat poison callback.

2) The Bait Rapper You Didn’t Know You Needed3) Snoop Dogg x Warringah Park School (Melbourne)4) Retail Rumble: Dollar Tree Meltdown5) Micro-Up

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