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Why Your Three Year Old Hits You and How to End It - Fast!
Episode 1443
Your sweet preschooler just turned into a pint-sized whirlwind—kicking, screaming, and even hitting.
Before you panic or punish, listen in. Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack why three-year-olds lash out, why it’s actually developmentally normal, and the calm, practical steps that help them (and you) find peace.
Key Points
- Why hitting at age three is common—and not a sign you’re raising a violent teen.
- The real drivers: big emotions, low impulse control, limited language.
- Three core responses: stay regulated, set clear limits, redirect with movement or creative outlets.
- After the storm: empathic conversations and rehearsal for “next time.”
- Prevention tips: check the HALTS (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, Stressed) and keep screen time low.
Quote of the Episode
“Regulating emotions is harder than learning to walk or tie shoelaces. Your job is to stay the adult while your child learns.” – Dr Justin Coulson
Resources Mentioned
- Little People, Big Feelings [Webinar] – practical tools for parents of toddlers and preschoolers.
- Little People, Big Feelings [The Summit]
Action Steps for Parents
- Stay calm—model the regulation you want your child to learn.
- State the boundary—“We have gentle hands. Hitting hurts.”
- Redirect energy—offer drawing, movement, or grounding games.
- Debrief later—when calm, problem-solve and rehearse next time.
- Check the basics—food, sleep, connection, and screen habits.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Published on 3 months ago