Podcast Episode Details
Back to Podcast Episodes
Special Guest Jennifer Capezza: "Why It's Hard For Victims of Domestic Violence To Leave"
Season 2 Episode 11
Why don't domestic violence victims "just leave"? This question reveals a profound misunderstanding of the invisible prison that is an abusive relationship. Jennifer Capezza from LI Against Domestic Violence returns to guide us through the complex web of barriers that keep victims trapped, often for years or decades.
The conversation begins with sobering statistics – one in three women experience abuse in their lifetime, but these numbers only reflect reported cases. Domestic violence victims face a unique challenge: unlike other crimes, they're frequently disbelieved. As Jennifer explains, "It's the only crime that falls into that category."
Using the high-profile P Diddy case as an illustration, Jennifer breaks down the concept of coercive control – a psychological prison where victims have no free will. "By definition, the crime itself prevents somebody from leaving," she explains, drawing parallels to cult indoctrination and Stockholm syndrome. This helps us understand why someone like Cassie might return to her abuser despite horrific treatment.
The podcast explores how abuse occurs in six interconnected forms: physical, verbal, emotional, sexual, financial, and cyber. What makes domestic violence particularly insidious is how these forms layer upon each other. Jennifer provides a powerful example of how threatening to break someone's phone simultaneously represents financial abuse, emotional manipulation, implied physical threat, and isolation – all without raising a hand.
Perhaps most eye-opening is the revelation about attempts to leave. While statistics suggest it takes 7-9 documented attempts before leaving permanently, Jennifer argues these numbers only reflect visible actions. In reality, victims contemplate escape "hundreds or even thousands of times" – making mental plans, considering options, and hitting barriers repeatedly before any visible action occurs.
The episode concludes with a commitment to explore financial and safety barriers in part two, and a reminder that help is available 24/7. Whether you're personally affected or simply seeking understanding, this conversation offers crucial insights into the complex psychology of domestic violence and why the question should never be "Why don't they leave?" but rather "What keeps them trapped?"
Join our private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/771136888074777
Follow Melissa on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/missjayl/
Follow Melissa on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@healthychef1
Published on 11 hours ago