Episode Details

HEADS UP: This conversation does mention sex and pornography. 

In this episode, I sit down with Danny and Kelsey to hear their journey from active LDS members to stepping away from the church together. Danny shares how years of pornography-related shame from bishops changed when one compassionate bishop told him "if only perfect people could go to the temple, the temples would be empty" and invited him to the temple instead of withholding it. That moment of love instead of shame cracked open years of buried pain and started his faith transition. Kelsey talks about how moving to Colorado saved their marriage by getting away from family voices telling her to divorce Danny, and how she eventually started her own faith journey after constantly receiving pity instead of understanding from church members. They discuss how they're raising their kids with curiosity instead of dictating beliefs, holding onto Jesus's teachings of compassion while letting go of the institution, and wishing everyone would seek to understand others rather than judge them.

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Takeaways:

Danny's experience in the bishopric highlighted the need for compassion over shame.

They emphasize the importance of curiosity and understanding in relationships.

Both Danny and Kelsie aim to raise their children with open discussions about faith. 

Chapters:

00:00 Spiritual Upbringing and Early Influences

03:13 Pivotal Moments in Faith Development

06:11 Challenges and Questions in Faith

09:26 High School Experiences and Social Dynamics

12:14 Shifts in Religious Views Over Time

15:11 Experiences in Mission and Early Marriage

18:10 Navigating Church Leadership and Personal Struggles

21:03 The Turning Point in Faith Journey

24:27 The Pressure of Expectations

28:02 Breaking Free from Shame

31:44 Deciding to Stop Feeling Bad

36:01 Shifting Perspectives on Self-Talk

39:58 Navigating Mixed Faith Marriages

44:34 Finding Support and Understanding

49:46 The Journey of Self-Discovery

54:15 Navigating Pity and Compassion

58:41 The Journey of Leaving the Church

01:01:38 Teaching Children About Beliefs

01:08:23 Embracing Different Perspectives

01:11:47 Curiosity and Understanding in Relationships