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Standing in Two Worlds-Episode 68-What FaceTime Has Wrought
Season 1
Distance Communication: Ultimate Facilitator of Knowledge or Bane of Intimacy?
R. Kivelevitz traces the social ramifications of distance communication – from the advent of letter writing to the world of modern electronics – in terms of interpersonal connectedness and the gradual eradication of privacy and personal space. Whereas face-to-face interactions are multi-sensory, letter writing provided communication that was limited to written words and content.Telephone added auditory context to words.
Juni stresses that intimacy is emotional and essentially bereft of context or informational exchange per se. He cites the halachic ritual of consoling the bereaved (Nichum Aveilim) where verbal communication is not essential and is even restricted. He harkens to the psychoanalytic perspective of relationships and interactional intimacy, citing the Freudian maxim that all relationships are not intrinsically determined by any personal characteristics of the other person or social context. Instead,they are mere efforts to re-enact the primal early relationships with one’s parents and entail a yearning to correct retroactively residual stressors from frustrating childhood relationships. The actual value of communication is therefore minimal, and any intimacy between adults is not genuine as it is merely a forced substitute for the now-bereft childhood closeness towards parents. Relationships that focus on sexuality, shared values, “love,” or enjoyment of life (for example) are thus psychodynamically superficial. As such, the only meaningful aspect of interpersonal interaction is the content of information-linked messages; emotional and relational issues are not genuinely linked to the present and thus functionally irrelevant to communication per se.
Juni contrasts the Freudian stance with that of Object Relations Theory (the branch of Psychoanalysis currently in vogue) which posits that the need for intimate relationships is hard-wired into the human psyche. This renders relationships as intrinsic to human existence – on par with food,sexuality, and avoidance of anxiety. From this perspective, the elimination of relational contexts engendered by distance communication represents a frontal attack against the very essence of relationships and rips into the fabric of social humanity.