Episode Details

If you’re realizing, “My husband won’t stop lying.” you’re not alone. Below you’ll find six ways he’ll react if he gets caught.

Understanding these reactions can help you make sense of the situation and take steps toward emotional peace.

Common Reactions When a Man is Caught Lying

Recognizing your husband’s reactions when caught lying can help you decide on the best course of action.

1. He Calls You Crazy

The most common tactic he’ll use is to undermine your perception of reality. By calling you crazy, he deflects the focus away from his actions, placing the blame on you instead. This gaslighting technique can leave you questioning your sanity and doubting your instincts.

He may tell others that you’re crazy too, isolating you from support.

2. He Claims You’re Not Remembering Correctly

Another method of deflection is to insist that you have your facts wrong. By questioning your memory, he seeks to create confusion and doubt, hoping you’ll back down from your accusations.

3. He Says There’s Another Side to the Story

When confronted with the truth, some men attempt to reframe the narrative by suggesting that there are two sides to the story. By doing this, they aim to sow doubt and present themselves as a victim or “just” misunderstood.

When someone is lying, there aren’t two sides to a story. There is only truth.

4. He Undermines Your Credibility

In efforts to protect themselves, men may attack your credibility, telling others that you’re not trustworthy or reliable. This tactic serves to isolate you and make it harder for you to seek support or validation.

5. He Accuses You of Not Trusting Him

When caught lying, a man might try to turn the tables by accusing you of not trusting him. This shift in focus can make you question your judgment and feel guilty for even bringing up the issue.

6. He Claims You Don’t Respect Him as a Man

By alleging that you’re disrespecting him, he diverts the conversation away from his actions and makes it about your behavior. This tactic aims to pull your attention away from the real issue: his lies.

Understanding the Bigger Picture

Lying in marriage is a form of emotional and psychological abuse. For some women, they can be experiencing decades of this type of abuse from their husband, especially if he’s hiding his pornography use or affair. Click here to take my free emotional abuse test with lots of examples of emotional abuse.

It’s sad that when a man is confronted about this type of abuse, he reacts with the same abusive lies.

You’re Not Alone

If you’ve experienced these responses, know that you’re not alone. Many women in our Betrayal Trauma Recovery (BTR) group sessions have faced similar situations. The isolation, fear, and frustration you’re feeling are valid and need to be processed.

Being believed and supported is the first step toward reclaiming your peace.

Being called crazy or untrustworthy can be deeply hurtful. It’s crucial to find spaces where your experiences are validated, and your emotion