Podcast Episode Details

Misery Is Optional – Redefining Softness, Structure & Anxiety with Mark Rashid & Crissi McDonald | Ep 32 Equine Assisted World

Episode 32

 In this thought-provoking follow-up episode of Equine Assisted World, Rupert Isaacson reunites with legendary horseman Mark Rashid and clinician-author Crissi McDonald. This time, the conversation shifts deeper into the internal landscapes of both horse and human, exploring what it really means to be soft—without losing structure.

From navigating low-level panic and reframing anxiety, to understanding when pressure is productive and when it breaks us, Mark and Crissi offer powerful insights not only for horse people, but for anyone seeking a more peaceful way of being in the world. Broadcasting from Happy Dog Ranch in Colorado, they also share how kindness, community, nature, and play are essential ingredients in creating meaningful transformation.

(If you want to support the show, you can do so at Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/LongRideHome )

✨ What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

The Paradox of Softness & Anxiety (Starts at 01:00)

• Why striving for softness can trigger anxiety
• Mark's pressure scale (0 to 10) and self-regulation in real time
• How internal tension blocks horse-human communication

Speed Bumps and Nervous System Awareness (Starts at 08:00)

• Crissi explains the compounding stress of modern life
• Why we don’t need to always be calm—and how to ride the nervous system wave
• The idea of setting stress aside just long enough to connect

When Softness Meets an Unready Horse (Starts at 13:00)

• What to do when your horse is not in a soft state
• The art of doing what you can do instead of forcing what you can’t

Pressure vs. Anxiety (Starts at 25:00)

• How pressure can lead to problem-solving, while anxiety leads to shutdown
• A lesson in reframing stress as “just an event, not an emergency”
• Why “Misery is Optional” became a clinic motto

How We Live Matters (Starts at 31:00)

• Crissi’s 20-year journey toward balance: food, sleep, connection, movement
• The surprising role of creativity (like watercolor and photography) in emotional regulation

Clinic Structure That Feels Like Freedom (Starts at 36:00)

• Daily dojo sessions: breath, safety, and playful presence
• Giving students permission not to ride—and why that sets the tone for learning
• Letting laughter and safety replace performance pressure

Nature, Tribe & the Horse-Human Herd (Starts at 42:00)

• Designing Happy Dog Ranch to support exploration, not confinement
• The unseen structure that holds clinics together
• How horses themselves teach people, especially when given time and space

Softness With Structure (Starts at 52:00)

• Why softness without structure isn’t softness at all
• Rain contact, feel, and feedback loops in real time
• Mark’s practical metaphors: the coffee cup, the skeleton, and invisible teaching moments

Building Confidence Without Force (Starts at 1:10:00)

• How support teams guide riders back from the edge of overwhelm
• Letting people grow without letting them get lost

Kindness as Framework (Starts at 1:20:00)

• The radical idea that a clinic structure can be kind—not punishing
• Why many riders unconsciously argue with happiness
• The ripple effects of affirming "You're okay. Your horse is okay."

Reclaiming Tribe & Breaking the Misery Habit (Starts at 1:30:00)

• The loneliness epidemic in the horse world—and how clinics become family
• Mark and Crissi’s reminder: We get good at what we practice—even if it’s unhappiness
• Why being of service to horses and humans might be the simpl

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  Published on 2 months, 1 week ago