Episode Details

In this episode, Sam meets with Jennifer Salzman, an expert on ADHD and the relationship between ADHD and alcohol. They talk about the emotional side of ADHD (particularly how it affects your relationships and your feelings), why alcohol is especially bad for the ADHD brain, how she quit drinking for good, and how she has overcome rejection sensitivity, cognitive hyperactivity, and self-loathing.

Listen to this episode if you have ADHD, and you're not necessarily sure if you count as an alcoholic, but you sometimes question your drinking habits. (Hi, Sam here. That's the bucket I fall into, and Jennifer validated a lot of my feelings in this convo, which made me feel really seen and empowered. Highly recommend.)

Key moments:

02:27 ADHD in men vs. women

03:18 What it’s like to have ADHD before receiving an official diagnosis

04:39 Do you ever feel like everybody hates you?

05:05 Rejection sensitive dysphoria

06:20 Reading too much into things

06:39 Gen Z self-diagnosing and having access to new language

09:00 How ADHD makes it hard to maintain healthy relationships

10:33 ADHDers are particularly vulnerable to love-bombing (also: moving fast in friendships)

11:50 Having high expectations of people without communicating them

14:43 Resolving the unhealthy patterns

16:06 Practicing mindfulness when we’re so used to living our lives on autopilot

17:35 Common but overlooked symptoms of ADHD (i.e. the emotional piece of it)

18:30 What’s missing from ADHD treatment plans

19:38 Medication as treatment for ADHD

20:11 Drinking while using ADHD medication

21:18 Sam’s first time trying Adderall

24:01 ADHD coping mechanisms (outside of medication)

27:08 Feeling your uncomfortable feelings instead of resisting or repressing them

28:40 Click here if you don’t necessarily identify as an alcoholic, but you sometimes question your drinking habits

31:53 Sam’s current relationship to alcohol

34:18 How the shame and stigma around alcoholism prevented Jennifer from seeking help

35:59 How we worry about the wrong things (aging, fitting in, etc.)

37:50 What alcohol does to people with ADHD

40:07 What it feels like to be unexpectedly diagnosed with ADHD

43:18 Why alcohol is particularly bad for the ADHD brain

45:20 How Jennifer quit drinking (and how she helps other people quit drinking)

52:41 Microdosing for ADHD and Jennifer’s relationship to other substances

56:21 Self-acceptance as a tool for healing

57:55 Peace is not the same as complacency

59:02 Resources for coping with ADHD and substance use disorder

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Resources for this episode can be found here.

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