Episode Details

DAMION1

In our 'That's cute, Sam, because I don't want my son to grow up in a world where college dropouts slowly replace human brain function with profit-driven AI' headline of the week. Sam Altman doesn't want his son to grow up with an AI best friend 

In our 'In other news, Ikea will call its forthcoming store in Boston simply 'Ikea,' sources say' headline of the week. ESPN will call its forthcoming flagship streaming app simply 'ESPN,' sources say 

In our 'Ex-CBS Director O.J. Simpson not named director after found not guilty of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman and because he's dead' headline of the week. Ex-Tyson Foods CFO John Tyson named director after misdemeanours

In our 'In her acceptance speech, Ms. Boswell said, "I won't sleep until your toilets are 45% less smelly and disgusting, on a year-over-year basis starting in 3Q 2026."' headline of the week. Clorox Announces Election of Gina Boswell to its Board of Directors

In our 'The fourth director was referred to as "a bloated idiot who doesn't know the difference between a case of synthetic hydraulic fluids and a Diet Pepsi.' headline of the week. Shareholder advisory firm backs 3 of Elliott's 4 Phillips 66 director nominees 

In our 'Sir Andrew Witty listed the top three 'personal reasons' in no particular order: "Fuck. This. Place." ' headline of the week. UnitedHealth CEO steps down for ‘personal reasons’

MATT1

In our 'Universally reviled man pays self' headline of the week. UnitedHealth CEO Andrew Witty was 2024's highest-paid payer CEO. Here's a look at what other execs earned

In our 'Universally reviled man takes a vacation' headline of the week. UnitedHealth Group CEO Andrew Witty steps down, company suspends annual forecast

In our 'Universally reviled man replaced by universally reviled man who replaced different universally reviled man he replaced' headline of the week. UnitedHealth CEO