Episode Details

Lila interviewed Christopher Titmuss for several years, on different themes and topics relevant to awakening in our life. 

Christopher Titmuss, a senior meditation and Dharma teacher in the west, a former Buddhist monk in Thailand and India, offers Dharma teachings addressing the wide variety of issues in daily life including mindfulness, meditation, communication and wise action. 

 Lila and Christopher are long term friends and were teaching together since 2004, including in this MTTC course (Mindfulness teacher training course). 

 EXTRACTS FROM THE INTERVIEW     MTTC course, October 21, 2017 Germany 

21.10.2017 MTTC Germany 

The interview begins with conditions in centers in the west and east, (5 min)

Dharma has an outreach to reach to all, without exception.

Christopher reveals how he is working inwardly with negativity and blame being thrown at him the distinction between praise and appreciation and much more.

2 things: one is resilience: I have done enough impermanence practice to help with that…)

While listening the thought arises – this is what the person is telling me today. This might change. 

The second thing is that I have to expect reaction. It comes with the role. 

I make a distinction between praise and appreciation. 

Praise is the wish to impress, saying kind words to others to build somebody up in order to get something I return. It might be recognition, wanting some approval, some extra agenda going with it. 

Appreciative joy is free, because its Divine, from self interest.

 What tells you the difference?

I smell it… with praise there tend to be a little exaggerate.

With blame – I search for the point of truth in it.

I don’t recall adopting the view – oh, it's just your projection on me. It's just your problem, not mine.  I feel uncomfortable when teachers or anybody with authority makes that claim.

When there is something in it -

Do you ever get hurt or offended? Hurt sounds too strong… I'll feel plenty of unpleasant sensations…

The training over decades -  The immediacy of the response – everything is around posture: physical posture and psychological posture, presence, eye to eye contact, Keeping the hands very still, checking for relaxation in the whole of the body. Though it feels unpleasant, but keeping present in front of it, in front of the other. The problem in the hearing is that its contracting, and my inner one liner – if I get upset or angry, I just handed my inner experience on a plate to somebody.  I just refuse to do it!

The physical presence is remarkable for defusing.   If I start to lose it feeling start coming up here and there, and then the voice… I might hurry from here to sit. Stop, have a minute of silence. In the silence, I'm really just feeling back down. Feeling back down, feeling deep, out of the field of thinking. Feeling the inside quite deep down of the body, that seems to be outside of the world of mind and thoughts and concepts.

Just for a minute, and then there is a readiness to speak or to go to the next thing.

Silence is the foundation of a healthy or appropriate communication. 

 In a conversation like that, generally speaking, I don’t start of the sentences with the 'I' language. To go into the 'I' language tends to sound defensive. It feels defensive.  So rather than trying to expl