Episode Details

If you want to help your daughter in an abusive relationship, Anne’s mother and sister share how they could have helped her.

If you feel like this emotional abuse quiz could help her, have her take this free emotional abuse quiz. Discover if she is experiencing any one of the 19 types of emotional abuse.

1. Help Your Daughter Identify The Abuse

“I described my husband’s behavior, physically intimidating me, yelling in my face, manipulating me, gaslighting me, and unsafe behavior by him. But even then, I didn’t realize I was in an abusive relationship.”

Tragically, emotional abuse is difficult to identify for both victims and their support systems. As family and friends honestly and authentically communicate with the victim about their concerns, victims may identify the abuse quicker and take appropriate actions to get to safety.

2. Help Your Daughter In An Abusive Relationship By Taking Her Seriously

When family and friends minimize the abuse, they are re-traumatizing victims.

Anne’s sister shared, “Anne would call and say there’d been a fight. I would often say things like: everyone has problems in their marriage, or I’d try to downplay it. I was trying to normalize maybe what had happened or relate to it in some way. But that only made things worse for her.”

Minimizing Abuse Looks Like This

Wondering what forms the minimization of abuse takes? Here are some things that family and friends may say minimize and/or justify abuse:

• Everyone has their problems
• What did you do to make him act like that?
• Are you sure you’re not exaggerating?
• Everyone gets angry now and then
• Choose your love and love your choice
• Don’t nag about your husband – it’s not right
• We all know he has a temper, but that’s just how he is
• Think about your kids – don’t separate or divorce or they’ll have a broken home

3. Help Your Daughter By Validating Her

Offer your daughter support. Listening, believing, and offering support are powerful ways to validate a victim’s experiences. Let her know she’s not alone. Tell her about daily Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group Sessions.

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