Episode Details

Many of us have baggage that we carry around throughout our lives like a camel. 

Most of these limiting beliefs or fixed ideas are things that we have learned through experience from people or events in our lives. Some of these come from a parents, friends, lovers, teachers and so on. 

Unfortunately, many of these beliefs are negative. They have not come from successful, positive people, but usually from unsuccessful, negative people that we encounter in our lives. 

We carry these beliefs around like backpacks which weighs us down throughout our lives. 

We drag them into new relationships and expect people to accommodate us and our emotional baggage.

Examples of these beliefs could be: 

• I don’t trust men, I don’t trust women
• Rich people are greedy crooks or evil
• Money is the root of all evil or is bad for us
• People who are nice to us want something in return.
• People of a certain race, age or gender are this way or that way

Learned beliefs are deeply ingrained into our minds like a default setting, which you can replace with a new setting. 

We will continue to carry beliefs around and unless we deal with them they will slow us down for the rest of our lives.

Instead of taking the ‘beliefs backpack’ off of our backs and mentally throwing on a virtual fire, we expect people to “deal with it” because “this how I am” so “take it or leave it”!

It’s as if we simply expect people to accept and accommodate our limiting beliefs. Maybe we don’t say it directly, but indirectly you are pigeonholing people you probably don’t even know based on your past experiences. 

You’re saying, this is what I believe because I’ve had a bad experience with some loser or abuser, therefore I’m going to hold back on everyone else based on this one bad experience. 

It’s absurd when you think about it!

At the extreme end, people are killing each other because of difference in beliefs over different variations of the same religion!

A believe is something that you learn and accept as the truth. Once we have a belief lodged in our head ii will stay there until we change the default sessions. 

For instance, you may have been brought up with a certain faith or set of values and refuse to accept anyone who does not meet your standards. 

You may have been brought up to believe that people from another country are bad based on the fact that your country once had a war with their country. This could be a recent war or a war that happened a century ago. 

Beliefs can be formed unconsciously by the behaviours of others, such as our parents, with whom we spend most of our time. People who have had abusive parents often, but not always, go on to become abusive themselves. It might sound like a cliche, but many inmates in prison have come from broken or even abusive homes.

People whose parents have never worked and lived on benefits can pass this habit on to their children. There are areas of the UK where there are three generations of families who have never worked and just lived on benefits.

A recent report in the UK found that the third of children worry about family finances

On the other hand, children from loving and successful homes are more likely to pick up those success habits. Again, this is not always the case but from my observation I’ve seen it time and time again.

When I wrote ‘Yes money can buy happiness’, I wrote about people’s limited money beliefs that hold them back in life and even put a subconscious ceiling on how much they can earn. 

Whilst money obviously plays an important part when it comes to living a happy and secure life, it’s not the be all and end all. In fact, most of our happiness comes from other people around us.

Think of a time in your life and you feel happines