Episode Details

Are your expectations quietly costing you your peace? Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.

That is Alexander Pope, and it is one of my favourites. Bruce Lee said the other half of it: I am not in this world to live up to your expectations. I never once asked my stepdaughter how she wanted me to show up. I just expected. A man cleans the whole house for his partner, she walks in, steps over it, and they barely speak all evening. He had built a picture in his head all day and never told her it existed. Other people do not care about your expectations. Not because they are cruel. Because they cannot see them.

One thing to try: Pick one expectation you are holding. Say it out loud to the person it involves. That is the whole fix.

In this episode

• (1:16) Bruce Lee, and the other side of the coin
• (2:43) The life people assume I would have had
• (3:49) I never asked her how she wanted me to show up
• (6:28) Looking for the keys at eleven minutes to four
• (7:39) The first few days of the diet, and then nothing
• (10:04) He cleaned the whole house and she stepped over it
• (11:46) Did you actually ask him
• (12:48) Every one of my carers sees a different mess
• (16:20) The basics you can reasonably expect

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Thank you for listening.

Steven

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