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Episode 306: Reframing Disappointment as an Actor
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Today I'm going to talk about reframing disappointment.
One of my favorite quotes. It's from Dr. Wayne Dyer, he says "Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change."
And in reframing disappointment, we need to look at it in a different way.
So I'm going to give you a few tips.
I'm going to give you some Action steps to do when you face disappointment and hopefully that will help you to move through it because again, another one of my favorite quotes, again, a top five is Robert Frost, which is the "best way out is always through."
So this podcast is about moving you through disappointment.
Number one, acknowledge the disappointment. And this is so important. One of my phrases that I teach is awareness, acceptance, and action. Obviously, you are aware of the disappointment, but you really need to accept it. And acknowledge it so that you can then move on through the rest of this podcast to take action to reframe it and also learn from it and move on from it.
So it's important to first allow yourself to feel disappointment, rather than suppressing it. Another one of my little phrases is, feelings aren't facts.
And also, feelings aren't going to kill you.
And also, this is survivable.
Whatever happened that's disappointing you, it is survivable.
But it is important to feel your feelings.
One of my favorite ways to feel my feelings, especially when they're a bit confused or jumbled, is to make a cup of tea and to start writing it out.
And I just literally do stream of consciousness. And it can be even, I don't know what the hell to write, I don't know what to do this is what happened and then I describe the whole thing and as I'm describing it, the feelings come out and hopefully some tears come out or some anger or I do a run or something like that.
But it helps me to feel those feelings because suppressing it is not going to help.
Recognizing your emotions helps you to process them in a healthy way.
Everything I just talked about is processing your emotions in a healthy way, which is the first step towards reframing the situation and moving forward.
So our first step is to acknowledge the disappointment. Again, awareness, acceptance, action, journal, those feelings out. Exercise those feelings out, but feel those feelings so they don't get suppressed.
The second one, a personal favorite of mine, although it's not very pleasant while you're going through it, is to identify the lessons learned.
I have said so many times that my biggest mistakes have been my greatest teachers.
Every setback is a learning opportunity and has a learning opportunity, take the time to analyze what went wrong and what you can gain from the experience.
You could've done that audition, did it to the absolute best of your ability, and still not have gotten the part. And you're like, you know what? I left it all on the floor. I did everything I could, and yet I still didn't get the role.
Maybe what you learned is, that's the level you need to be performing at because you know you can perform at that rate.
One of the things I think is so painful is living with the knowledge that you could be doing so much better, that you could be doing so much better.
Trust me, that feeling is so much worse than walking through your fears to reach your full potential.
That's so much more painful than being brave and best way out is always through walking through your biggest fears, because once you've conquered those biggest fears, then there is absolutely no limit to what you can achieve.
So