Episode Details

I remember the many times the Universe has tried to prevent me from doing something that I wanted to do anyway. No matter how many obstacles were put in my path I forged ahead, determined to succeed at all costs. And I paid the price in time, energy, and heartache. 

Why did I not see the clues I was receiving for what they were, warnings that the path I was on was not the best one for me, that it was not aligned with the outcomes I wanted in my life? 

What made me forge ahead with my plans, determined to plow through whatever obstacles were in my way, no matter what it took (and sometimes it took a lot)! 

The clue phone rings often in my life and I don’t pick up because I don’t want to hear the messages, but I have learned to listen and then wait for more information because the clue phone always tells me exactly what I need to hear.

I think that being an Aries has something to do with it — I can be very stubborn and keep fighting until the bitter end, but there is also an element of fear present in my unwillingness to abandon my obsessions. 

What if there was nothing else beyond what I saw as my only option? If this didn’t work I would have to start over again and I had invested way too much time, energy, and effort in this particular outcome to give up before I got what I wanted (sound familiar?).  

So when the clue phone starts ringing, in the form of events, situations, signs, and hints from every direction, asking me to look in another direction, I just pretend to be deaf and blind and ignore them.

One situation stands out in my mind as a great example of this. I wanted to work for a company and had managed to contact the CEO and get an interview. This was a leading edge technology company I admired and respected and I really wanted this job. 

A few weeks later I had the interview with the CEO and the department head I would be working with. I just knew that my strong technical background, years of software research, development, implementation, and troubleshooting experience and great project management skills would be an asset to the company. I had a strong resume and great experience, what else did I need?  

The CEO was impressed but the other man was a little nervous because I was more experienced and qualified than he was. I noticed he kept looking at me and I could tell that he was very uncomfortable with my presence. (Clue number 1)

Intuitively, I could feel his discomfort and I knew this was going to be a problem as I had faced this situation before. Even though I didn’t want his job, he probably wasn’t convinced and the tech industry is extremely competitive.

But since I had impressed the CEO, I was sure I had the job. So I kept in contact and waited for the offer letter. Meanwhile, I got several other interview offers but turned them down because I knew that I was going to get this job. When I called the department head’s office he was never around and he never returned my phone calls (Clue number 2).

Then I called the CEO and he said it was out of his hands, it was up to the department head (so the CEO  wasn’t going to support me, Clue number 3). This was going to be a problem because the CEO who had offered me the job initially was now obviously not going to override the opinion or choice of the man who was already nervous about me and I had not even started yet and he would not talk to me.

I had some software that this company produced and one day, a month after my interview and after making another call to the company to find out when I would be receiving the offer letter, I opened my desk drawer to get the product CD and it had broken in half. How that happened is a mystery because I always kept the CD in that drawer, along with others and it was the only one that was broken. (Clue number 4).  Do you know much force it takes to break a CD in half? I tried one,