Episode Details

“My crush is drooling all over my hot BFF.” “My boss took advantage of me during my internship.” “I ran into my toxic friend on the sidewalk and didn't say the right thing.” Caroline and Erica can’t fix it. But we have thoughts.

Welcome to our first ever all-listener question episode. Chiming in with her sage advice is the elegant and eloquent Caroline. Caroline is known for her reasonable decisions and excellent sense. She has her YouTube PhD in attachment trauma, toxic relationships, and facial yoga. Every week, Caroline reads a self-help book and shares what she learns with her grateful gal pals at Pizza Night. Caroline is impeccably qualified to solve our poor listeners’ dilemmas. And she prefers to remain relatively anonymous so we have represented her here with this splendid, contemplative flamingo. (Caroline's on the left and Erica's on the right.)

Content Warning: Mention of sexual assault in the workplace and verbal and emotional abuse. But Caroline’s soothing wisdom and compassion might be just the thing.

Ann Lamott’s Bird by Bird may also be quite soothing.

Scroll down to read today’s listener questions from the Ugly Duckling, Picked From the Slosh Pile, and Standing In the Sidewalk in the Rain Talking About the Weather. Apple listeners may need to check out this post on Erica’s website for the full versions of these small essays.

Ukulele Segment: One Fine Day, written by Gerry Goffin and Carole King. Dear Carole King, my deepest apologies for suggesting that you did a cover of your own song! It was originally performed by the Chiffons.

Follow Erica on Facebook or Instagram or check out her generously personal essays at ericajschmidt.com. You can also make her day by sending her a listener question to any of these places.

Listener Question From the Ugly Duckling

Dear Erica (and Caroline),

I am 39 and seven years sober. A month ago, I met this charming and funny dude at a recovery meeting. We both seemed to love stand-up comedy, nature videos, and storage solutions. And since he has been sober for a solid four years, I figured it was an okay idea to let myself have a crush on him. We went out for coffee a couple of times, and it was lovely, but he told me he still had feelings for his last girlfriend, and had come to the conclusion that he wasn’t yet ready to date. We agreed to be friends.

He’s new to town and randomly, we ended up at the same event. I was there with my best friend who happens to be a total knockout. When me and my crush first ran into each other, she was in the bathroom. He and I chatted and enjoyed our regular banter. Then my best friend appeared and it was like suddenly, I didn’t exist. He complimented