Episode Details

Have you ever been so low that euthanasia started to sound reasonable? I got there this week, and I had never been there before.

This is raw and I am leaving it raw. Autonomic dysreflexia sends my blood pressure to around 250 over 150 because my body cannot get a message past the break in my neck. It feels like a hundred needles going in wherever you touch me. I was put on the bed and back in the chair over and over until quarter past twelve, head pounding, sweating, freezing. Afterwards I watched ten minutes of Homes Under the Hammer because I could not bear to move. In a couple of hours it gets better. In a few days it gets worse again.

One thing to try: Stop chopping the ends off the stick. Cut the bad end and the good end goes with it.

In this episode

• (3:00) What autonomic dysreflexia actually is
• (5:23) The signal that cannot get past a broken neck
• (6:23) 250 over 150, and a hundred needles
• (7:40) Quarter past twelve, and the worst of it
• (9:09) Ten minutes of daytime telly because I could not move
• (11:27) What I do while I am lying there
• (12:47) In a couple of hours it will be better
• (13:45) Chop off the bad end and you lose the good one
• (16:17) Deny one feeling and you deny its opposite

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Thank you for listening.

Steven

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