A Drinking and Driving Disaster with Martin Lockett

Episode 132

If you’ve ever driven your car after a drink or two then I think this episode is going to send a shiver down your spine

It’s a story of tragedy – and redemption

It’s a story which emphasises the fact that our whole future can change in a split second

My guest this week is Martin Lockett – a guy who made two bad decisions

He decided to drink and drive – and then to jump a red light

Two people died and Martin spent nearly 20 years in prison for manslaughter

His whole life has been defined by this traumatic incident that ended two lives and changed his forever.

In this Episode

Although he grew up in a rough area Martin was blessed with two loving parents who did their best to keep their boys busy with after school activities
This worked well for a while but as they became teenagers it was not so easy to manage them – and they started to mix with the wrong crowd.
Like most teenagers Martin was searching for his “identify” – trying different ones on for size
He developed several identities and had the wardrobe and the vernacular to suit each identify
He had his school style, then his part time job style and then his gang style
He was navigating between different worlds, not really feeling comfortable in any of them
This internal conflict drove him to use alcohol to quell his anxiety
Martin’s identify crisis made me think of the inner struggle that we experience when we are drinking too much – we know we should quit but we can’t imagine life without it – so we drink more to quell the anxiety
Like many drinkers Martin was in denial – and able to convince himself that he was ok because his life was pretty functional
He had a job, lived with his girlfriend, paid his bills, was studying to be a nurse
Many functional alcoholics delude themselves in this way – I certainly did – I had a good job and a nice family so I was fine
The thing is it takes a huge amount of energy to hold it all together when we are drinking – energy to get up and go to work when we are hungover, energy to cope with young children when we are exhausted, energy to keep up the pretence that everything is “fine” when we know deep down that it's far from fine.
And one of the many joys of sobriety is that as we free ourselves from the shackles of alcohol we release that energy and can use it in more positive ways
Martin took us through the chilling tale of the New Year’s Eve that changed his future, that split second decision that cost him his freedom
He talked us through the horror of the aftermath – the horror of realising that he had killed 2 people and that the price would be 20 years in prison
And he was only 24 years old
He spoke of the ripple effect of the tragedy – the effect on his own family and friends – and of course of his victims
As he says we can never really imagine the magnitude of our actions – until it actually happens
After a few days in prison he was given a newspaper – there he was on the front page
As he read the article he discovered that his victims were active in the recovery space – his horror at what he had done deepened as he discovered that good people they were
At the end of the article the journalist had written “perhaps the person who will be helped most by this tragedy is the driver”
Martin reflected on this statement for days – how on earth could he be helped by this terrible incident?
For months he would meditate on that phrase which played over and over in his head
Eventually he came to the conclusion that the only way he could try to atone for what he had done would be to spend the rest of his life continuing the good work of his victims
That would be the only way that some good could come out of this tragedy
Just one year into hi

Published on 3 years, 2 months ago

Podcast Episode Details

A Drinking and Driving Disaster with Martin Lockett