Episode Details

About 25 years ago, I was giving a speech at my father’s 65th birthday party. There were seventy or eighty people at the dinner and, as Dad was a playwright, most of them were theatricals.

I’m a comedian, it was a fun occasion, so I wanted the speech to be funny. There were a few entertainment VIPs in the room, so there were professional as well as personal reasons to make sure my speech was as good as possible. 

But it was also a very personal occasion - a landmark in my dad’s life - so there was no way I was going to crowbar in bits from my act. I wanted the speech to be special: I love my Dad very much and I wanted to say so publicly. But I also didn't want the speech to descend into an embarrassing, gushing, sentimental affair. It was by no means the hardest speech I've ever had to give, but there was still a balance that I had to get right, and I felt a bit of pressure because there were so many professional performers in the room who were way more experienced than me.

As I was speaking, and I guess I was feeling a little nervous, I noticed someone looking at me. Of course, the whole room was looking at me, but this was the only person I noticed. He had friendly blue eyes, narrowed in a frown of intense concentration, and he seemed deeply interested in what I had to say, and very sympathetic to the difficulties I was having making such a speech. I don't know if I was projecting my own imagination, but there was a wise, kindly look to him. I’d never noticed anybody listen like that before.

It was a few moments before I realised it was the actor, Timothy West. 

Thinking about it later, it made sense to me why Timothy West had been such a popular actor with his peers. He listened so well. In a room of eighty people all doing the same thing– his was the listening I noticed.

(Any aspiring actors reading this: work on your listening. It’s a crucial, yet underrated skill and one that is rarely taught. Teaching is concentrated around the bits when you are doing the talking. Watch what wonderful listeners many great actors are.)

Fast forward a couple of years and I was doing a set on the Radio 4 show, Loose Ends.

This was around 1999 and, in those days, the show was recorded live, but the only audience you would have were the four or five other guests on the show who would be sitting in the studio with you, along with the host, Ned Sherrin.

You got some real VIPs on that show - I used to do it quite a bit. Off the top of my head, I remember appearing with Jackie Collins, Danni Minogue, Divine Comedy, Mariella Frostrup, Sir Humphrey Burton, The Proclaimers, and many more besides. But most of them would be thinking about their own bits, so doing comedy in that little studio to four or five people who weren’t that interested could be a bit like doing comedy into the void. Comedy is hard without an audience - even if by the time it made it out of the radio, it seemed to work.

I think it was the first time I had done the show, so I was nervous. There I was, doing my Ludwig The Bavarian act, all dressed up in my lederhosen costume, with all sorts of nerves rushing through my head as I did my act to no audience, when there it was again. The look. The kindly, listening, I-know-what-you’re-going-through-and-I’m-on-your-side look.

This time it was Michael Parkinson, one of the guests on the show. While all the other guests, and, to an extent, Ned, were wrapped up in their own stuff, Parkinson took time out to listen to me. Straight away I understood why he had been such a successful chat show host.

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The Today Programme

We move on over ten years to 2012 and my first book, Life After the State, which, as the title suggests, makes the case for a lot less government in our lives