Podcast Episode Details

Sober Warriors - with artist Jo Roets

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Episode 128

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My podcast guest this week got sober at about the same time that I did – back in 2015 – which makes us Sober Sisters with 7 years of sobriety.

Jo Roets is an artist and I discovered her amazing work on Instagram one day.  I fell in love with a work of art called:

'Anabantoidei'

You can find this gorgeous work of art on the cover of this Tribe Sober podcast – according to the artist Jo this image “embodies the warrior qualities within the female spirit” and that’s why I decided it was so appropriate for our Tribe – yes we have some awesome guys within our Tribe but the majority of us are certainly warriors in the battle against the booze 

In this Episode

• Jo’s drinking wasn’t too hectic during her college years but when she had a child at 23 she found herself feeling resentful of the way her career had ground to a halt whereas her husband’s life had not been disrupted to the same extent
• She had another child after a couple of years so drinking wine every evening became her routine - her way to relax
• Jo was working as a college lecturer but by the time it got to 4pm her mind was filled with thoughts about drinking – where would she get her wine, how much would she get – and the first thing she would do on arriving home was to pour a glass
• Like many of us Jo had no “off” switch - she would continue drinking all evening and what began as one bottle became two – in fact she graduated to wine boxes as it was easier not to think about the quantity she was drinking
• She felt that she was trapped and we agreed that daily drinking puts us in a kind of Groundhog Day where we wake up feeling determined not to drink but by late afternoon we’ve changed our mind – basically we’ve been in withdrawal all day and that’s why that first drink tastes so good
• One day Jo’s mother in law told her that Jo and her husband both had a problem with alcohol
• They were still in denial and felt angry but for Jo the seed had been planted and it was the catalyst for change
• The drinking continued for a while and Jo told us the story of passing out in a flower bed in her apartment block – when the caretaker came to help her up she just gave him some money to go and buy some wine – even though she’d already had plenty!
• One Sunday Jo realised that she would have to get some help and one of her friends took her to an AA meeting –listening to the shares made her realise that she was not alone in this and gave her a language to express how she was feeling about her drinking
• She felt “understood” – that’s why it’s so important to join a sober community who know what we are going through – our friends and family will either tell us to just “cut down” – or if they drink a lot they will reassure us that we are fine and making a fuss about nothing!
• As Jo said you need other people in recovery to understand the “depth” of it.. secrets will make you sick and there is no need for any secrets with your sober community – they’ve been there!
• Jo threw the book at her alcohol problem – she went to 3 meetings a week and spent her evenings reading about sobriety rather than drinking with her husband
• Of course those early months are tough and we agreed that the only priority is to “not drink” and to stack up those alcohol free days – we really need a year of sobriety so that it becomes the new normal
• Although AA was not right for Jo’s husband he did eventually ditch the booze and follow Jo’s example – she is so delighted that they are both going to better role models for their children
• The biggest benefit of sobriety has been rediscovering who she really is – Jo had lost her true self and has even discovered that as an artist she can connect with a creative force on a much deeper level than when she was painting with a glass of wine next to her
• We agreed that the link between alcohol and creativity is

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  Published on 3 years, 3 months ago